Expectations Unfulfilled

After thirty-eight years of Life as an Insomniac, I discovered something wonderful last winter:

I sleep well when I’m cold.  COLD as in it’s FREEZING outside and I sleep next to a big window. That kind of cold. My nearly lifelong insomnia was obliterated in the beauty of one real winter after a life lived in much warmer climates.

I suffered through its return with the spring and summers months, longing for autumn and the cooling temperatures for the first time in my living memory. And then…winter arrived again!

Sleep. I crave it. Sleep aids (of the over the counter variety) impart unto me restless leg syndrome and send me wandering—drugged and clumsy—around my house in the middle of the night. Natural remedies have done nothing but serve to relax me, that is all. But cold weather?

Bliss.

Not this winter. Not much at all. Not enough to break the insomnia cycle.

Waking up at 2:30 and staying that way for 19+ hours was not fun.

This morning, I awakened shortly after 1:05 a.m. Could not get back to sleep. I read an old familiar story on my Kindle, book-light not flaring on my retinas, and tried desperately to find La La Land, but to no avail.

More than three hours later and my day has started in earnest.

Where is the winter that brings somnolence? I can only wait, passively, for its return.

 

7 comments

  1. Warren C. Bennett · January 15, 2013

    I sleep better in the cold as well. I discovered this when in Yellowstone. Since the bed that was empty was next to the window, I would fall asleep with the cold breeze coming in and the sound of the river in my ear. I slept like a baby.

    One good thing about living in a cold climate, I suppose…

    • Sandi · January 15, 2013

      It is a good thing, yeah. I look forward to someday sleeping again. 🙂

  2. Jack Flacco · January 18, 2013

    I find keeping the house cool at night helps so much with my sleep. I’ll sleep through the night whenever it’s freezing cold out. I guess it has to do with the circadian rhythm and how we also have shorter days in the winter.

    • Sandi · January 18, 2013

      I guess! It’s just something I am still adjusting to. 🙂 In South Florida, the days were considerably longer, even in winter. I do enjoy the change, though. Good that you get good sleep in the winter, too. 🙂

      • Warren C. Bennett · January 18, 2013

        One thing I do not like about Missouri is the 5 pm darkness. It shoudln’t be night at 5 pm..grrr. I might get used to it, but I’ll never get to the point where I *like* it.

  3. bebeccalee · January 23, 2013

    I hope the cold cold weather comes and helps you sleep for awhile before spring gets here!
    I don’t like the sleeping pills either, they also send me wandering. Have I ever told you the story of me hallucinating on the plane to Thailand about Mario when I studied abroad one summer? The nurse gave us sleeping pills to regulate our sleep…bad idea for me!
    Sending you sleepy and peaceful thoughts for night time. Love you! 🙂

    • Sandi · January 24, 2013

      Hey, hon! I hope so, too, but lately even with the cold, my mind seems to wake me up stupid-early. Alas.

      NO, you never told me about the hallucinations on the plane. That’d be scary, I think. Yep, bad idea about the meds. Gak.
      Love you too. 🙂

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